Poem 8 | {I had to give up}

By Ajanta Judd All Rights Reserved – 6am 27/06/2020 Australian EST – No Prompt

{I had to give up}
I had to give up yearning for you
to come back to a shared reality
in which a more objective view was mutual
and as good as it ever would be
If I clung to the moments when you had some balance
in no time would come the brooding dark absence
evoking disdain, displeasure and defence
And then I would only suffer anguish again
If I had not given up yearning for you
to return to a tenuous pseudo norm
I would be tipped as you tip within that cycle of yours
Suffering would be mine as I’m weathering your storm
I had to give up yearning for you to be alright
and learn to buffer me against your moody endless flight
but sometimes I forget that you’re rarely that well
and that is a sadness I must reconcile with – your hell.

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