janinmarathon

  • Come the end of this poem, I laughed at the suggestion to “eschew the company of girls and babies.” I realized how light and fun this whole poem was. This was the tone I intentionally applied as I read the second time. You capture adventure within this tour, giving attention to universal bodies we don’t always consider. You describe with…[Read more]

  • I love the solid colors and the movement you create here. Your layering is nice; it creates a nice movement, for it makes my mind’s eye move upward to the flowers atop each other. I then like the tumble (“cascade”) at the end. It keeps a positive energy; you even turn gray skies a bit brighter because of the red roses with green thorns.

  • “midnight sky is a dark sky” could be a line in a soothing lullaby, and the idea of “comfort/in dreams” could be a gentle suggestion to a sleepy child. OK. . . it could be a gentle command for sleepy me, too!

  • The silence of this is what first impressed upon me as I read, and it seemed as if you were suspended with no movement. As I read again, however, actions became more apparent: a body with movement even if the foot stayed still, a falling petal, a floating book. Still, there seems to be the same suspension. I enjoyed reading this and suspect more…[Read more]

  • The ongoing movement in this poem makes for an active day. It’s not chaotic, though, I think because of the “smooth” music, “sashay” and “parlay” actions, and then how you eye your pillow and luxuriate as you “ease” your eyes. This could have been frenetic and anxious, but you make the day almost like a dance.

  • “Fighting all kinds of
    Crazy”
    contrasted with
    “This has
    stretched
    And blessed” make for a lovely tension that captures this marathon experience well. While we know the context of the poetry marathon, this can apply to so many other experiences in life, making this a universal poem in many…[Read more]

  • I enjoyed reading this. I read this three times, and with each reading the images became more vivid with color. At first, the locker seemed gray or blue in my minds eye, with white papers and pale or silver items. The “jungle” towards the end led me to read again and picture more colors and tangle the second time I read it. That second time…[Read more]

  • Wow! This made me wince and gasp different times. Barbaric, majestic, mechanical: these struck me the first time I read because of the ways we’ve been observed (angry women), idealized (doing no wrong as angels), or overworked (expected to do, do, do). The gasps came because of the way we ourselves often cast each other.

    The mimicry like a…[Read more]

  • janinmarathon commented on the post, Goddess 1 year, 4 months ago

    Ah, you have touched my mythology-loving heart big time with this! I have read it and reread it many times. Foremost, you effectively address so many of the characters/archetypes which have shaped our own world for millennia. I admire how you weave them together. Second, I read this aloud and found lovely rhyme and rhythm without any “sing song”…[Read more]

  • I was surprised by all the sounds and sensations that emerged in this poem: plucked ukulele strings, blue fingers — frosted fingers, the sound of scraping, resistant ice, and rawness. The ukulele takes me to summer (whether true or not) so becomes more pronounced against the cold of winter. For me, this is a vivid, strong poem. I’ll return to…[Read more]

  • You have strong description throughout all of this, and I feel like I know a bit of your “Papaw Kidd” from the way you described his closet and clothes. More than that, I gained a sense of him because of those two dogs who you capture beautifully. They were loyal guardians to him, and my favorite part is how you became their guardian. The last…[Read more]

  • Timely. . . Perhaps consider this as a single poem chapter of a book some day. I’ve seen that in different compilations, and it led many people to look up what was happening at the time.

  • Whatever you choose, I give my full support. Sometimes we want the same experience again, but we often don’t see the full impact on others. You were amazing leaders this year, and I appreciate the work I see and am grateful for all I haven’t seen. As a newbie, I’m not familiar with the whole marathon so cannot volunteer to lead this, but I will…[Read more]

  • Your character here seems to be an other-worldly being, perhaps an angel or perhaps a fairy. Perhaps it is a reflection of another aspect of yourself. No matter what, though, I like the lively aspects of this female. I’m intrigued by the phrase “A pearl of wisdom comes without blame.” You capture quite a bit of magic, but I also wonder about the…[Read more]

  • This seems like a prayer or a shared community response at a holiday ritual. As I read this, I imagine a group of people with shared ideals rededicating themselves to a new year. They truly “refill the well and replenish our cup.” My favorite part is the awe and wonder that you convey in the words, “If we so choose to see the world and explore as…[Read more]

  • Perhaps it’s because you are “feeling so fly” as you write, but you seem very young and full of energy throughout this poem. It appeals to me specifically because of these qualities. You convey a young person’s appreciation for 3 a.m. pancakes, sleeping until noon, needing sun as much as the rainy naps, and even parents. Whether you are writing in…[Read more]

  • Again you engage my sense of taste quite effectively. Starting with sweetness, I was anticipating something quite different (I missed the title the first time I read this) and then found myself surprised by the sour apple. The hope of sweet love dashed by tart rejection is one many (if not all) can relate to. One suggestion that I have is to not…[Read more]

  • “Bittersweet” is a perfect closing adjective after all the descriptions throughout your poem. Taste is effectively presented throughout, and all these sweet or comforting treats lose their appeal — leaving me wanting more, even more of the poem. Well done!

  • “. . . birds sing loud for their winter queen. . . ” what a powerful phrase! I feel cold, alert to chirps, and hushed at the importance of the regal moment. This whole poem carries similar strength throughout. You have quite a way with words not only in this but in the other poems as well.

  • What are the things we yearn for? This poem made me think about what we often want for ourselves — priorities that we think we need but do not really consider at a soul level. “How much is a prayer worth to you?” is a haunting question when we really stop and think about it. How often do we want more kisses, fast love (not true), or a quick…[Read more]

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