The Truth Is Out There

 

Standardized reporting system for UFO’s

 

Please circle one:

 

Did you report this sighting as an:

Unidentified Flying Object (UFO)

Unidentified Aerial Phenomena (UAP)

Unexplained Physical Object (UPO)

 

I was unable to identify the driver of the UAP due to:

Tinted windshield

Loss of bowel control during near-miss situation

Being a notoriously unreliable Navy pilot

 

The UPO appearance was:

A deflated weather balloon

A large bottle of Stoli

A Lucky Cat

 

What best describes your thoughts about extra-terrestrial beings?

Alien rights are Human Rights

Build a big, beautiful Space Wall

The only Good Alien is a Dead Alien

 

What are your concerns about reporting the UFO?

Stigma. Other Navy pilots won’t talk to me

Reprisals by big-headed beings with huge eyes

Marco Rubio says he believes the truth is out there