{"id":106020,"date":"2022-06-24T14:12:20","date_gmt":"2022-06-24T18:12:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/?p=106020"},"modified":"2022-06-24T14:12:20","modified_gmt":"2022-06-24T18:12:20","slug":"crazy-gigi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/2022\/06\/crazy-gigi\/","title":{"rendered":"Crazy Gigi"},"content":{"rendered":"

I\u2019m not turning back. No turning back.<\/em> Those words push me through many situations. It\u2019s too early for hindsight I think as I am typing this. When was the last time you were happily awake for twenty-four hours? Young adult art insomnia is the answer. <\/p>\n

I am a Gigi that is raising the child that made me a Gigi and her aunt whom is soon eighteen. We live in a madhouse. One big pendulum of emotions. I haven\u2019t really slept a full night in two years. We are pissy with potty-training rules, rules of the road, and plain ole stinking rules of life.<\/p>\n

I typed in the answer to that one question so quickly that I should\u2019ve known I\u2019d done the same as always jumped without sight of landing safely.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou don\u2019t think about the big picture!\u201d My teen tells often when her latest dream has not become my priority.<\/p>\n

\u201c I believe that I do.\u201d I say. Having learned that this conversation could go on for weeks if I don\u2019t finish it.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell! You don\u2019t think about it when you are accepting a new challenge. Maybe you think after you say yes!\u201d She likes to look you in the eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat sounds right. I don\u2019t have time to convince myself to turn away from something difficult that may help more than it is uncomfortable. You\u2019re right about that!\u201d I look in her eyes to confirm affirmation.<\/p>\n

She and her teen brain chalk it up as defeat either way. <\/p>\n

No turning back.
\nI need this for me, was the answer to the question.
\nI used all my working benefits to become a stay at home Gigi and take care of my granddaughter as her Foster mom until court says otherwise. During this time my daughter and I sought therapy as we added her brothers child into our space. It wasn\u2019t easy, text book or fairytale.
\nI haven\u2019t journaled really since graduate school. Haven\u2019t spoken words of my poems in so long I don\u2019t remember if I can Poet.<\/p>\n

I will rest well tonight or not. I will have journal and pencil and pen on hand. I will set alarm for those hours I am sleeping and add to potty training routine. I will take time today to write my favorite words, imagined, royal, slang and every word in between. I\u2019ll look over some forms and structures so that my gibberish might become real tings.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I\u2019m not turning back. No turning back. Those words push me through many situations. It\u2019s too early for hindsight I think as I am typing this. When was the last time you were happily awake for twenty-four hours? Young adult art insomnia is the answer….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4290,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-106020","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-miscellaneous"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/106020","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4290"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=106020"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/106020\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":106041,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/106020\/revisions\/106041"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=106020"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=106020"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=106020"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}