{"id":20912,"date":"2016-08-13T14:25:43","date_gmt":"2016-08-13T18:25:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/?p=20912"},"modified":"2016-08-13T14:25:43","modified_gmt":"2016-08-13T18:25:43","slug":"if-my-laptop-were-personified-5","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/2016\/08\/if-my-laptop-were-personified-5\/","title":{"rendered":"If my laptop were personified #5"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>What if my laptop were personified?<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I ask myself on a sunny day.<\/p>\n<p><em>It would have fainted at the slightest of turbulent weather.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><del><\/del><em>And it would probably have inhuman DNA.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>Won&#8217;t connect to the wifi,<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>battery would die in less than two hours,<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I said beginning to tick of items on a long list of things<\/p>\n<p>wrong with my laptop and maybe yours.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>It would be like an irritating best friend,<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>always there and always unreliable,<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>always decieving and always pranking,<\/em><\/p>\n<p>but my love for it is unclassifiable.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><del><\/del><em>And I would pamper it with gifts,<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>and expensive software upgrades,<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Avast Premium doubling as life insurance,<\/em><\/p>\n<p>as my laptop punches in the decades.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What if my laptop were personified? I ask myself on a sunny day. It would have fainted at the slightest of turbulent weather. And it would probably have inhuman DNA. &nbsp; Won&#8217;t connect to the wifi, battery would die in less than two hours, I&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":770,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,441],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20912","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-marathon-poem","category-poetry-prompt-responses"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20912","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/770"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20912"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20912\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21072,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20912\/revisions\/21072"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20912"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20912"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20912"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}