{"id":46371,"date":"2019-06-22T09:15:56","date_gmt":"2019-06-22T13:15:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/?p=46371"},"modified":"2019-06-22T09:21:20","modified_gmt":"2019-06-22T13:21:20","slug":"silently-sad","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/2019\/06\/silently-sad\/","title":{"rendered":"Silently Sad"},"content":{"rendered":"

Poem 1 <\/span><\/p>\n

Silently Sad<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

By: Ashley L Powers <\/span><\/p>\n

I sit here with frustrated thoughts <\/span><\/p>\n

My inner fists beating against these walls I\u2019ve built<\/span><\/p>\n

This is what it must feel like to be in prison<\/span><\/p>\n

Trapped within the bars of my mind\u2019s cell<\/span><\/p>\n

I feel like I\u2019m choking, it\u2019s really getting hard to breathe<\/span><\/p>\n

I truly feel suffocated by the pain<\/span><\/p>\n

The thoughts, the hurt, flows through me like a ocean<\/span><\/p>\n

But I can\u2019t swim so I\u2019m drowning <\/span><\/p>\n

My insides are crumbling<\/span><\/p>\n

Yet my outside shows no sign of trauma<\/span><\/p>\n

I let the smile on my face fool everyone<\/span><\/p>\n

People ask me if I\u2019m okay…<\/span><\/p>\n

And YES flows from my mouth with ease <\/span><\/p>\n

But it\u2019s truly taking everything in me not to break down and scream<\/span><\/p>\n

I want to yell at the top of my lungs…<\/span><\/p>\n

…HELL NO I\u2019M NOT FINE, HELP ME PLEASE<\/span><\/p>\n

Why can\u2019t you see that I\u2019m hurting? <\/span><\/p>\n

I tell myself that no one cares<\/span><\/p>\n

So I keep everything bottled up <\/span><\/p>\n

But inside I\u2019m slowly dying <\/span><\/p>\n

Behind closed doors I\u2019m crying <\/span><\/p>\n

Waves of emotions that keep pulling me under<\/span><\/p>\n

Every night that I rest my head<\/span><\/p>\n

I lay in my own tear filled puddle<\/span><\/p>\n

But I\u2019m a Pisces so I should be used to it <\/span><\/p>\n

I just want to be rescued<\/span><\/p>\n

But there\u2019s no one to save me<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019m fighting myself, trying to stop the tears from falling<\/span><\/p>\n

My internal dam can\u2019t take all the weight<\/span><\/p>\n

So it folds under pressure<\/span><\/p>\n

The cracks I tried to seal are beginning to break <\/span><\/p>\n

Tears so heavy I can\u2019t focus <\/span><\/p>\n

But I make sure to wipe them away before you notice<\/span><\/p>\n

I have to pretend to be perfect <\/span><\/p>\n

Y\u2019all look at me and see Ashley<\/span><\/p>\n

I look at me and see half broken…<\/span><\/p>\n

…heartbroken<\/span><\/p>\n

I see a woman who\u2019s torn apart from her own confusion<\/span><\/p>\n

How do I tell the world I\u2019m shattered?<\/span><\/p>\n

How do I tell the world I feel like I\u2019ve lost everything that mattered?<\/span><\/p>\n

Until I figure it out<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ll just keep it to myself<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ll just keep sitting here staring at these four walls<\/span><\/p>\n

Suffering….<\/span><\/p>\n

….dying<\/span><\/p>\n

Slowing going mad….<\/span><\/p>\n

….silently sad <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Poem 1 Silently Sad By: Ashley L Powers I sit here with frustrated thoughts My inner fists beating against these walls I\u2019ve built This is what it must feel like to be in prison Trapped within the bars of my mind\u2019s cell I feel like…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1307,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-46371","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-half-marathon-poem","category-marathon-poem"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46371","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1307"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=46371"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46371\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":46450,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46371\/revisions\/46450"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=46371"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=46371"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=46371"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}