O Spinner of a Thousand Tales
\n(That recycle the same four plotlines)
\nO Maker of a Thousand Worlds
\n(Populated by the same 6 characters in different hats)<\/p>\n
I plead to you, Creator of (clean, black-and-white) Conflicts,
\nthat my narrative be flush with thine bounty.
\nLet my bitter rivals be placed upon buses,
\nlet my villains be as obviously evil as they are one-note
\nand let them receive their grim and tidy comeuppance.
\nThough not by my hand;
\nthe audience must needs think of me as pure and merciful.<\/p>\n
I beg you, Sovereign of Stories,
\n(we’ve all heard a million times)
\nLet my challenges be overcome
\nby montage and instant mastery.
\nLet that to which I turn my hand
\ngarner me praise and jealousy
\nof my peers and instructors both.<\/p>\n
I supplicate myself before you, Manager of Meet-Cutes,
\nThat all of my crushes shall,
\nin time, turn out to have loved me in secret.
\nThat I might find truest love,
\nwithout more than a glance at growth or self-improvement.
\nThat I might blunder into the life of someone special
\nJust when that special someone needs me most.<\/p>\n
Of you, Architect of the Profound
\n(as long you don’t think about it too hard),
\nI request the most saccharine of happy endings:
\nLet my finances be ever sorted off-screen,
\nand my hair only ever fetchingly tousled.
\nMay my recklessness be vindicated,
\nand my actions have only positive consequences.
\nGrant me a conventionally attractive one true pairing,
\nwhose only flaw (by the closing credits) is clumsiness.
\nAnd if it be thine will, equally appealing children
\nwho speak and reason like tiny adults.
\nGift me, O Cosmic Hack, a place for my came-with-the-frame family.
\nA gleaming castle, a stately manor, or a shimmering starship.
\nEven a nice brownstone would suffice,
\nYour servant is not greedy.<\/p>\n
With greatest humility
\nthy most devoted disciple.<\/p>\n
Mary Sue<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
O Spinner of a Thousand Tales (That recycle the same four plotlines) O Maker of a Thousand Worlds (Populated by the same 6 characters in different hats) I plead to you, Creator of (clean, black-and-white) Conflicts, that my narrative be flush with thine bounty. Let…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1262,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-48814","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-half-marathon-poem"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48814","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1262"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=48814"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48814\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":49512,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48814\/revisions\/49512"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=48814"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=48814"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=48814"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}