I have nervously awaited the POP
\nand sharp pain\u2014 ice pick
\nthrough my temple?\u2014 the shrieking,
\nshrieking, shrieking of a something
\nthat cannot be said, the dizziness,
\nthe euphoria of weightlessness,
\nthe wild and the wild and the wild
\nof my curls grasping at latex
\ngloved fingers and claiming,
\nthe squeaky wheels (less squeaky now),
\nthe no-time-for-anesthesia, the ethereal
\nconfusion and cloudy, the shine
\nof fluorescents and glint off the tray
\nof surgical tools, the surgical knife
\nand first incision\u2014 but wait!\u2014
\nthe shaving of my scalp, the vulnerability
\nof psoriasis barking back and biting
\nthe razor, the\u2014 okay, now\u2014 the first incision
\nalong my hairline vacated, the screams (mine?)
\nand the screams (someone else,
\nmaybe through glass)
\nand the screams (mine again), the knife
\nopening as my forehead blooms, the blooms,
\nthe incision precise as India ink swung
\non a twig, the sweat collecting on
\na hovering brow, the sweat dabbed away,
\nthe sweat absent from my face, the life
\nabsent from my face, the CRACK and saw
\nand another bloom, the smell of disinfectant,
\nthe smell of another woman scrubbing in,
\nthe smell of toffee, the lights (oh! the lights!)
\nin my unblinking eyes, the blood suctioned
\noff my brain, the grey matter that isn\u2019t grey,
\nthe pinch and the screams, the screams again!
\nthe clamp carefully placed,
\nthe anesthesiologist\u2019s apology, the drip
\nof the IV (finally!) blessed IV,
\nthe warmth in my groin, the morphine,
\nthe stainless needle stitching in an arc,
\nthe morphine, the vomit, the morphine,
\nthe morphine, the morphine, and
\nthe sleep.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I have nervously awaited the POP and sharp pain\u2014 ice pick through my temple?\u2014 the shrieking, shrieking, shrieking of a something that cannot be said, the dizziness, the euphoria of weightlessness, the wild and the wild and the wild of my curls grasping at latex…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1119,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-54669","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-marathon-poem"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/54669","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1119"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=54669"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/54669\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":54778,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/54669\/revisions\/54778"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=54669"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=54669"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=54669"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}