{"id":93472,"date":"2021-06-26T16:02:09","date_gmt":"2021-06-26T20:02:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/?p=93472"},"modified":"2021-06-27T03:33:20","modified_gmt":"2021-06-27T07:33:20","slug":"60mg-cymbalta-2x-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/2021\/06\/60mg-cymbalta-2x-day\/","title":{"rendered":"60mg Cymbalta, 2x\/day"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Do you understand when I say<br \/>\nI tried? I\u2019m tired. Dishes have<br \/>\namassed. I am dirty. I\u2019ve worn<br \/>\nthis nightgown for three days,<br \/>\ncoral palms fading and white<br \/>\nbackground turning toward grey.<br \/>\nI did. I do. I try. How to explain<br \/>\nthe fear? I\u2019m frightened of leaving<br \/>\nmy fortress, grey sheets, grey<br \/>\ncomforter, grey seal for comfort.<br \/>\nOne way in. One way out. My<br \/>\nkingdom of growled secrets.<br \/>\nMy heart slams out a drum line,<br \/>\nmy diaphragm punched in time.<br \/>\nI\u2019m dizzy, leather couch turning<br \/>\ninto a spire. Corkscrew into<br \/>\noblivion. There is no beauty<br \/>\nin this. Can I bloom my forearm?<br \/>\nMy thigh? My breastbone?<br \/>\nCocoa pebbles help, but they\u2019ve<br \/>\nbeen gone two weeks. A banana<br \/>\nbecause I promised. Coffee is<br \/>\na reasonable substitute. There is<br \/>\nmilk or cream. Both if I hunger.<br \/>\nSome days I float above my body<br \/>\nand watch, indifferent. Wish I could<br \/>\nturn it off or change<br \/>\nthe channel. Or change. Just<br \/>\nchange. How can I tell you<br \/>\nthe pain of breathing, even when<br \/>\nI remember nothing? How<br \/>\ncan I be seen?<br \/>\nThe body will say no.<br \/>\nThe body keeps the score. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you understand when I say I tried? I\u2019m tired. Dishes have amassed. I am dirty. I\u2019ve worn this nightgown for three days, coral palms fading and white background turning toward grey. I did. I do. I try. How to explain the fear? I\u2019m frightened&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1119,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-93472","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-marathon-poem"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/93472","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1119"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=93472"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/93472\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":93481,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/93472\/revisions\/93481"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=93472"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=93472"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thepoetrymarathon.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=93472"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}