Tea of Sarcasm(18th hour)

“Gather yourselves, ladies, prim and proper” Mrs. Havensham said, “with your powdered pearls protruding from your bosoms like so”

She continued, “Be certain to display your ivory white gloves, upon your intricate lil hands. For you see, Tea is high society and high socialites you shall be”

A voice rang out from the back, “How high?”

Mrs. Havensham was not pleased but continued on, “If a concerto is brought up in conversation be sure to mention how much you adore Mozart’s violins and or Bach’s organs”

“Like his insides”

“Don’t be ridiculous, not the internal kind, don’t be so crass. They wouldn’t like that. No woman should ever be so brass. High tea is serious business” She said with much composure “And you shall pursue it with illustrious gracefulness”

Pressing on, Mrs. Havensham sighed heavily and addressed the rest, “As you lift your cups and saucers to your lips, extend your pinkies out like this”

“Oh so we can pretend and put on the ritz”, the voice rang out teasingly

Red in the face, Mrs. Havensham approached the voice, “I would be remiss to say that your constant interruptions like today are liable to get you dismissed. And your etiquette lessons will wash away with your dreams of being a good wife. No man will ever want a woman who jokes about during tea time or sits around drinking wine and smoking cigarettes from time to time. Now sit up straight, legs crossed and keep quiet at all times.”

The woman raises her hand to Mrs. Havensham, “One last interruption, if I may. I believe a correction to your lessons needs to be made.”

“Such as what, exactly?”

“Such as, I do not wish to be put on Patriarchal display. Cluttered and tattered upon those shelves of double standards. Although, I speak my mind-I am quite polite to those who are deserving. It is my choosing if I want to wear white gloves and pearls and discuss the many overtures in Mozart’s Figaro. And I most certainly do not smoke cigarettes. Why, I bide my time by drinking wines of all kinds but what really gets my spirits going is a fine robust cigar with some bourbon or rye”

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