One thought on “Draft 2

  1. “find my hidden deep” is a powerful line – I was expecting perhaps ‘find my ___’ – eyes to match the first line, but then it switched to hidden being the adjective for deep. Unique syntax to create a completely unexpected meaning. The separation to the final line, and the repetition of phrasing leaves me feeling a sense of wanting, longing. It seems like a love poem of sorts, but also a poem of absence, separation. A lot of feeling elicited from a few well-formed lines.

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