I was thinking if him today and it made me smile. That ear to ear kind that makes your eyes squint and your cheeks rise. I could hear his voice saying my name in a loving tone. His beautiful imperfections I had gotten used to now I have to get used to loving memories because loving him is not an option. My choice but seemed like my hand was forced rather remember the past fondly then to suffer in the present. The hurt will keep me away reminding me of why I can’t have him.