The Poetry Marathon

Doors close
Sometimes it feels like it’s too soon
Like it’s not exactly
Time to move on
To move forward

We force doors open
Prying them open with our fingernails
Pressing into them with our backs
And our feet planted on the walls
Anything we can to have our way

Hubris leaves doors open that ought to be closed
Doors with weak hinges
That have rusted and creaked
Doors that should be demolished and left alone

But every door leads to a world of possibilities
Choose your own adventure
And see what each has to offer
You never have to stay on
One road
One path
One future
It’s never too late
To make a new choice

These illusions
Which we’ve centered our lives
Aren’t as concrete as we imagine.

They aren’t as fixed
As we’ve been taught
They’re as fixed
As a house made
Off exploited labor
Cutting corners
On stolen land

Easily destroyed by the earth’s
Mighty winds and flames
They aren’t as absolute as ones and zeros
Yes and no
As it is
And as it can’t be

That isn’t to say that nothing matters
But that you get to decide what is important
That we are free to chose our paths
Free to question and explore
Free to create something
Complete
In the chaos of the illusion

A cold, summer rain crashes into my
cheeks turned up toward the pouring sky
It stings my flesh
Like tiny barbs
Painful and soothing all at once

My arms outstretch toward the sky
My clothes cling to me
As every drop comes to me
With purpose
Oh, the purpose of washing all my fears away

White noise fills my ears
Blocking out the sounds of the busy road
Ahead
I let myself
Dance and
Twirl
And frolic
Like I was in a field of wildflowers

Water splashes around my footfalls
Soaking through my socks and my pants
My hair absorbs the rain and pushes it down
Between my eyes
Like rivers returning to the ocean

Laughter fills me
And I am overwhelmed with awe
At the simplicity of this moment
And the magic it holds

Sweet notes of honeysuckle linger in the air
Mixing with the whisky on his breath
I bury my face in the crook of his neck
Melting into him like chocolate chips in cookie dough
He becomes my altar
Where I bend and pray
In worship
And thanksgiving
I offer him each of my worries
And revel in the strength behind his embrace
He is my love
And I am his
The pulse of his heart beating
Against mine
Thump
Thump thump
Thump
Calming the panic buzzing through me
I match the pace of his breath
In and out
One
Two
Three
He squeezes his arms around me
Keeping me grounded in his strong foundation
My love
And his

You ain’t fooling me again
With that chip on your shoulder
With your eyes narrowed with deceit

You ain’t fooling me this time
With your shady intentions
And the lies that surround your smile

You ain’t fooling me again
Like you did before
With your perfect words
And your swag

You’re good at making me believe
In you
In us
Like a roll of Thunder
On a cloudless night

You make me believe in magic
And hope
And love

But you ain’t fooling me again
Not this time

One look
And my guard falls to hell
Every ounce of survival instinct falters
And my heart melts to mush
Memories flash in my minds eye
Scorching and heady
Arms and legs tangled in sweat
Cheats heaving
Lips smashing into each other
With fervor

One look
Sends me off my balance
Teetering over the edge
Desperate for that sweltering connection that we used to have

One look
And my heart is crushed
Into sharp and jagged pieces
For what was and what could never be again

One look
Is all it takes for me to question everything
Every fear
Every desire
Every expectation

Two ships passing in the night
With just
One look

Swirls of colors zoom past my head
Filling up the space above and below

The edge of the earth

Where void and expanse
Touch
Tempting peace and time
Like the creation of Adam
Always in each other’s orbit
But never touching
Never connecting

I hold my breath in my chest
Feeling it’s warmth spread through my limbs
The sun is so close
But it’s blazing fire keeps burning

The chill of emptiness
Penetrates beneath my skin
Burrows deep in my meat and bones
There won’t be much more time here
And I’m at peace with that end
At peace with this choice
To sit at the edge of the world

Matted hair covers my palms
It’s not mine
Not kinky like mine
Not dark like mine

I hadn’t realized how hard I was pulling
When I took a blade to his throat

I brush the hair from my hands
As if that would wash away the remnants of him
He’s made an indelible mark on my soul
I hate him for it
I hate me for it

Crimson soup pools around his crown
Like those images of white Jesus
Neither of them are what they say they were
What they tried to turn me into

Panic claws at my chest
I take a step back, hoping my shoes aren’t drowned in blood
They are
I liked these shoes
They’re cheap boots
I thought would last as long as necessary
Now they’re covered in blood

Goddammit!

Goddamn all of this!

He can’t hurt me anymore.
He can’t hurt anyone anymore.

Music blares from the party we just came from
The sultry rhythm calls to me
Beckoning me like I’m stuck in its trance
I take off my shoes and think of a way to dispose of them later
For now, the party is dark and loud
Offering me the cover I need.
The metallic scent of him
The burgeoning wafts of death and decay
Permeate my nostrils

This was for the best.

The earth belongs to no one
But we are apart of it all
We share its wind in our breath
It’s rivers in our tears
It’s canyons in our wrinkles
It’s sun in our smiles

We hold time in our hearts
With every thump and every beat
We take up space with the largeness of our bodies
Knowing that we demanded to be here
To be seen
To be felt
To be known
To be loved

We are the earth
The earth is us
An inextricable link
Never severed
Never cut
Despite the demands of this social hierarchy
We are the earth
The ocean
The stars
The sun

Never deny your glory
Never deny your beauty
Never deny your presence

They want us docile and simple

Weak and attentive

Leaving our desires behind

Shunning our passionate nature

The want us voiceless

And suffering in silence

They want us calm and unaware

But as the fire burns through the sky

As it rips through the stars

Like a dragon through the sky

We become one with the fire

We let our rage become us

We let our passion roam free

We let our desire lead us

Life is in our hands

Not yours

Our hands

Not your