A first-person shooter with no goons to kill?
A maze where you follow the rat?
A puzzle, a lesson in bending the rules?
There’s much more to Portal than that.

A subtle tutorial, learning through play,
A guide with a memorable voice
That gives you instructions each step of the way
But will you obey her? Your choice.

No customisation, no highscore, no lives
You failed? Well just try, try again.
And when you succeed, there’s no victory parade
Just your satisfaction remains.

So why should you play it, apart from the memes?
(Remember, the Cake is a Lie)
Until you’ve been Chell, you just can’t understand
Why this game, and its fans, never die

There’s much more to Portal than pellets and traps
Or turrets around every bend.
And once you’ve survived all that GLaDOS can do,
You’ll just love the song at the end.