Hour 6: Jazz Man

So, what have you done with them?

Everyone I gave you?

 

What did you do

with Wynton Marsalis and

Herbie Hancock?

 

Show

me

what

you

know!

 

1e&a, 2 e&a, 3e&a, 4—

For fu-asdfugghjkl (grrrr)

You’re better than that.

There’s life beyond fours.

I taught you to count

in five to Brubeck.

Get out of the box

and into the pocket!

 

Riddle me this, Davis—

 

Where have you given

Miles room to live

in your bones?

 

Find your own fire—

your kind of blue,

then say something!

Don’t get stuck walking

when you can swing

all the way off the page

 

Listen to each one again

I still expect you

to show me what you know

about becoming music

 

Hour 1: A low of nature

A law of nature is undisputed

nomattter how low

what else can we love if we can’t love winter

love itself is unmoving

such coldness –

fractures my bones, ruptures my veins

sadness avalanches

goodbye winter

Self-Worth

I never thought much of myself

just a girl that was told she

would never amount to anything

too stupid for college

but just right for takin orders.

those words always stayed in my head.

never could I believe in myself

never could I appreciate myself

nope! My mother’s words sewn deep

into my brain. Everyday those were the

words that I’d wake up to. Another day. The same words.

one day I took control of my life. I was terrified at failure. You can’t do it, whispered throughout my day.

never good enough! Never smart enough. Until I broke those chains.

honours and A’s! Studied at Cambridge, England, too!

dear old mother, that always told me I’d never amount to anything…

look at me now! Living my dream! In London!
I finally found my self-worth…without you!

2022 Poem Two

CW: Mentions of eugenics, anti-abortion protests, HIV, COVID, accusations of grooming

Untitled

 

We’re on the edge.

Don’t cover your eyes, your ears.

The writing has been on the wall.

Written in the blood of those who came before me.

Your rose colored glasses just hid the warnings.

 

40 Days for Life;

no kink at Pride;

calling us groomers all over again;

CDC failure after CDC failure from HIV to COVID and before;

Eugenics baked into policy and law.

 

I’ve seen it coming.
I’ve watched it it swallow comrade after comrade.

If we’re lucky, we get a few bones back.

I’ve seen it coming.
It’s just now at your door.

Lost Chance (Hour 6)

I hadn’t encountered the word
mentor when you encircled me
with words that propelled me
to unthought-of heights

but in my mind
you were
suffocating me

and now I’m sad
that you’re gone
far from here

I cry still
even as I know
spilt milk
can’t be collected

I wish I hadn’t been naive
I wish I had known better

I admire you still
and in my mind’s eye
I see you scouting the shelves
or seated studiously
like a college boy
in the campus library

who would have thought
that this ordinary man here
studying like the rest of us
was a college professor
with a doctorate in the bag?

I admire you still, my Dr.
hoping our paths cross again
if Christ tarries

The Dusty City

 

In this dusty city , there was once a girl

she loved off reading books and eating ice cream swirls

along the passage,  she walks up and down

punctually everyday in her pink gown

she loves music and had it always in her ear

no matter how much you called for her , she can never hear

she paces up and down like a bowler ready to bowl his wicket

speeding so fast if cops were there she’d have gotten a ticket

oh the tails of The Dusty ole City

A Greeting From Aunt Leona

Hello, Nancy,

It is such a sweet gift —

permission to write you this letter.

God -as wonderful as we thought- gave me special permission

because something is coming

I am just to remind you of your reservoirs of love.

 

Remember in 1977,

when so many things were happening

turning you toward less dependent, more deliberate?

Oh, you didn’t see it that way.

 

The lay off,

the shut-off of the gas

and the phone,

paying the gas bill

only to find that the gas company could not reconnect

because there was a leak —

 

Those all seemed cruel facts of life,

but you were aware of the bills

from that point on.

Being a busy mom to two toddler boys,

a preschooler, and an almost first grader

kept you too dependent

but you needed to be aware.

 

That was also the summer when your cousin, Jimmy,

died from the motorcycle injuries.

 

You were right that God let me visit you

when the sadness felt too much to bear.

You knew that lovely scent of White Linen cologne,

as well as you knew that you were my dearest niece.

 

We both enjoyed dancing you around the living room

as your late afternoon fussing turned into giggles of delight.

As you grew to be a school girl

you loved getting up early to go to morning Mass

before I went to work,

we developed quite a bond.

 

You enjoyed being so loved — and somewhat spoiled. —

Losing Jimmy taught you

appreciate everyone while they are with you.

Your friends have been encouraged by the attention.

 

Your life has been blessed with a lot of love

sincere and generous love

in your parents, siblings, children, aunts

Do not waste time thinking of regrets.

God really does give us ALL that we need

when tough things come along.

 

That is how it is.

You will not always have the days or results you expected,

but you will always have loving care surrounding you.

God has you ready — and supported in the ways that count.

With Love from one of your favorites,

Aunt Leona Callahan

 

 

Vines – Hour 5 Prompt

My twenty first birthday was spent in an asylum, not as a patient, but as a guest of the ghosts

They watched us make our little movie

Maybe we helped them forget, even for a little while, what kept them there

Entertaining our spectre spectators

Their doors were still locked

Their files covered the floors of the hollow halls

Lead paint chips

Asbestos tiles

The beds looked uncomfortable

The windows to the courtyard were broken, and the outside was coming in

It will never be known if it was from the vines entering, or the victims trying to vacate

I hope they enjoyed the show