If you knew me-
the real unedited
version of me-
the one I don’t let others
see
you would walk away

I’ve done so much
with my life
mom and dad

would be so proud
though from the outside-
I’m so ordinary

There was a time
I traveled for sex
I was a whore
not too proud of that

There was a time-
I would hurt myself
cut
restrict
punch
temporary solutions

sometimes I want
to write nursery rhymes
to illustrate who and what I am

There once was a girl
that didn’t fit in-
so she stopped trying-
she died from lonliness
and no one seemed to care

But that’s not true-
is it?
I hope not

Or maybe a different one
like-

There once was a girl
that didn’t fit in-
she just didn’t care
and did her own thing
She lived a life well lived

There are so many moments
where I think no one would
care if I stopped living a life
well lived-

And instead
just existed
a mere shell of what
I used to be
was
could be