The Poetry Marathon

What is it, what is it?
I know that I know this.
It’s like, that word that means
But it’s not that word.
Or maybe it’s more like
But again, not that word either.
What is it, what is it?
It’s there at the tip of my tongue.

I suppose I’ll think of it later.

A warm summer day
Air dancing across my skin
Comforting, peaceful

Slipping between
What’s real and what’s a dream
One moment you’re gone from me
The next you’re here
Smiling pleasantly

I know what’s real
Reality is that you’re gone
You’ve been gone so long
I sometimes forget
What you were like when you were here

But then it happens again
I come home and there you are
Making dinner or on the computer
As if nothing has happened
To you at all

I try to tell my friends
Convince my family
I keep sleeping so easily
Between the two it’s getting hard
To remember what’s real

It feels to nice
Seeing you again
I just want to hug you
To talk to you
Tell you how I’ve been

But reality sets in once more
You’re not real, I tell you as much
Tell you, “This is just a dream”
To which you reply, “Yes, it is.
“But you can stay if you want.”

I jolt awake
Heart racing
Mind wondering
What could you have meant
When you said I could “stay”?

It’s been years since then
And some days when reality
Hits too heavy, too hard
I think about your offer
And wonder

Should have taken you up on it?

Running for my life
Past following close behind
Don’t look, keep running

Crossing swords
Matching each other
Blow for blow
“Are you fighting or flirting?”
Physically unable
To fight any more
Comrades intervene on both sides
The tussle ending in a draw

Courtly conversation
Turned into a debate
I am right
No, you are wrong
I am “difficult”?
Well, you’re impossible!
Walking away in a huff
Yet another draw

Fighting side by side
Battling enemies
Forging bonds
Greater than stubbornness
Seeing each other
In a different light
Realizing the truth
Of our feelings

Acknowledging our differences
Recognizing the difficulties
And future clashes to be had
A question asked
A mutual agreement “reluctantly” made
Knowing that when it matters
It will always end
In a draw

My boots are thick
But I can still feel
Crunch of frozen water
Snow packing beneath my feet

The cold bites at my nose
Tries to seep into my gloves
My breath a smokey array
Of frozen moisture

White specks begin to fall
Quietly from the sky
Sticking to the ground
Sticking to me

All around me
There is a kind of quiet
One you only find
I the dead of winter

With the silence
Comes a strange kind of peace
Anticipation
For the coming Spring

It was back
The crow with the single
Pale blue eye
Perched on Mrs. Haversham’s fence
Staring intently
Where it came from
No one really knew
But every day it came
Perching, staring
Immovable

They tried to scare it off
Shoo it away
But nothing they did
Seemed to have any affect

Time passed and soon the crow
Melted into the background
No longer noticed
By the passersby
No longer a mystery
Or point of concern
Just another piece of scenery
To be ignored

The day Mrs. Haversham
Passed from this world to the next
Rumors floated around
About what really happened
Some said it was natural causes
Some said it was suicide
Some blamed her greedy nephew
Some noticed the crow
Never returned

Look, that cloud is a dragon!
See it’s snout and tail?
And look, over there
Aren’t those flowers simply breathtaking?

I wish I was a pegasus
Flying above the world
Marvelling at all it has to offer
Wouldn’t that be something?

Everyone stares at her
The strange, unusual girl
Head always in the clouds
Never paying any mind
To reality, to the world around her

Droplets falling from the sky
Striking the hot pavement
The smell filling my nose
Bringing a flood of memories
And a feeling of happy contentment

I want to cry
But I couldn’t tell you why
I don’t even know it myself

I feel so overwhelmed
My fight or flight is activated
What’s wrong with me?

Logic knows I am alright
I’ve nothing to fear, I’m safe
Yet something is amiss

Just breathe, I tell myself
Breathe through the feelings
Breathe away the panic

Now the music is too loud?
I can hear everything
Going on around me, all at once

I feel like I’m suffocating
Should I step outside?
There’s too many people out there

What is this weight I feel?
I wish it would go away
I just want to be okay