Taahira

Sometimes, when two people meet, their souls recognize each other instantly

I am not talking about romantic love

This is not a fairy tale

Friendships can last a lifetime

Even if the other person lives half a world away

From two cultures, so different from each other

Two life experiences influenced by different things

We met on a hike

The sun was shining

She was with all her friends

I knew no one there

She was friendly, she was warm

And I determined to be brave

Years have passed

We have fought, we have cried, we have spent years apart

But we are still together

In spirit, in heart

When two people love and respect each other, distance means nothing

We get each other, despite our differences

And we both know our goodbyes are never forever

سلام آپ کے ساتھ ہو میرے دوست(Peace be with you my friend)
میں ہمیشہ تمہارے ساتھ ہوں (I am with you always)

 

My Heart is in the North

Across the sea

through frozen waves

and depths so deep that they have never seen the sun

Lies a land

sister to my own

separated billions of year ago

A land that holds my heart

From the moment I first stepped onto this land

with the rain lightly touching my face and the wind in my hair

the lush greenness and the freshness of the air

called me home

And I knew, this is where I belonged

But my passport says something different

Country borders are still a thing

and I cannot go home

No matter how much I long for it.

Alba, tha gaol agam ort (Scotland, I love you)

Bidh gaol agam ort gu bràth (I will always love you)

Tha m ‘anam a ’caoineadh dhut (My soul weeps for you)

Tha mi a ’cluinntinn gu bràth (My heart is yours forever)

A dh’aithghearr thig mi dhachaigh (Soon I will come home)

Haunted

Sometimes I don’t understand

Why I didn’t realize as a child

That the house I lived in was haunted

The windows, always the windows

I was terrified of them

Something was watching me in the woods

I made my parents buy me thick curtains that were never opened

Nightmares of faces scared me in the night

The woods I had grown up in,

That had raised me

Felt dangerous

And I had no idea why

Creaks in the night

Windows, so many windows

Burning at night with something unholy

When I was a toddler, so I am told

I woke screaming of demons in the air

Attacking me, swooping down to me

When I was a pre-teen, my fear of the windows drove me to my sisters floor where I slept for half a year

Something was lurking in the dark

Step outside children

And feel the cold creeping up on you

You are being watched, always watched

Your mother feels it too

This land is cursed

Only this house, built by your father, protects you

Come out to play children

We are waiting

 

 

 

Dearly Beloved

Dearly Beloved

We have gathered her today to solve a problem

Or at least

We were

But you all could not work together for five minutes

Your attitudes, your selfishness

You are ruining this

Can’t you see this is bigger than all of us?

Don’t you care that if we fix this, there is no tomorrow?

The world is ending

THE WORLD IS ENDING

Your problems are nothing

Your egos are nothing

Shut up

Shut up for five goddamn seconds

Listen to the earth

It is screaming at us

Screaming that it will destroy us

You think our mother will weep for us when we are gone?

When the parasites that have been trying to kill her since our first breath are finally extinct?

We have gathered here today to solve a problem

But none of you even showed up.

Speak now, or forever hold your piece

Because soon, we will all be gone.

 

Breaking Down

I was born old

like my father before me

but it was always in my mind

Now I feel old

in my body, and in my mind

tired

I am always so tired

And I just can’t be the way I was before.

My joints crack, my head aches, my muscles are soft

and struggle to do the things that came easily to them

I feel old

Is it my schedule, my diet, my outlook on life?

Has the world beaten me back or have I defeated myself.

They say its all downhill after 25,

and right now that certainly feels true.

But you know what is the worst part?

I can’t sit down and eat like I used to.

16 year old me, you have no idea how lucky you were.

You were strong, you were fast, and my god you could eat whatever you wanted and a lot of it.

Like, a lot.

Goodbye, fair princess of yesteryear.

I am breaking down, little by little…

I need to run more.

RIP Houseplant

From the day I brought you home

full of life, full of potential

I tried my best to give you what you needed

Bright sunlight, but not direct

Water once a week

a nice big pot for growing

But it has not been enough.

The first leaf dropped and I thought,

Oh, this is just from the trauma of the big move

Then another, and another, and another.

Entire branches came off.

I began to worry.

The weeks went by.

I called my mother.

She didn’t know what I was doing wrong.

Healthy leaves one day fall off dead the next

I run my hand over you, and you drop another five.

You are a shadow of your former self, only so many leaves left

I don’t know what to do.

You are dying in front of my eyes.

And all I can do is pick up your dead body parts off my floor.

I am sorry I brought you here.

I wish I had known.

RIP Houseplant.

You deserved better

Too close

Everything in this city is just too close to me

Too loud, too dirty, too bright, too tall

But most importantly,

Every on this fucking subway is too close to me

I am sitting

The man spreading his legs wide, arguing about fantasy football over text on my left

The woman with thicc thighs watching tv on her phone to my right

The fifty or so people crammed in front of me, arms and shoulders all presses together

Pretending that they aren’t screaming internally

The middle aged man wearing ill fitting trousers has his crotch right in my face

Everyone is way too close

I can smell them

Someone needs to shower bad

Oh for ducks sake someone farted

The putrid smell is slowly taking over

What did they eat last night???

I can feel their flesh pressing up against mine

This is way more intimate than I want to go, they haven’t even bought me dinner yet

A sneeze

Great

Now we are all sick

I hate this city

And I hate this subway car

Oh shit, it’s my stop. Gotta get off

Until next time train.

I will not miss you

 

 

Goodbye

Weary eyes blink in the light

Do we have to go mother?

Yes, there is nothing for us here now

But why?

Life isn’t fair sweetheart

I don’t understand

You will someday

Too far gone, the past already seems

Even though it is one step behind us

Forward, we must move forward

Into the bright light

Never looking back

On the childhoods we left behind

The Passenger

The whispers on the wind speak

I do not understand

The rolling waves of the river muttering from the depths

I strain to catch the words

Singing, singing, singing

The birds are singing

Death has taken one of their own

The cycle continues

I cannot hear it.

Life all around me

Death snuffs one out

The cycle continues

And yet I am deaf to it

The sun streams down

lighting up the leaves of the trees in a golden green

But I cannot see, not really see, what is happening in the shadows

What have I become, a passenger in this world, watching from the window,

from the train

from the street

All life happens when you are not looking

But with your eyes, with your ears, you try to catch it all as it goes by

Even then it is sometimes not enough