First Kiss
I floated home on clouds the day we met;
that first great kiss changed everything and more.
My life was full of “Haven’t done that yet,”
(I’d never tasted someone’s tongue before).
That first great kiss changed everything and more;
you taught me what it was to fall in love.
I’d never tasted someone’s tongue before,
but kissing, for you, just wasn’t enough.
You taught me what it was to fall in love.
My virgin hands were unsure what to do,
but kissing, for you, just wasn’t enough.
You made me want to learn the rest from you.
My virgin hands were unsure what to do –
my life was full of “Haven’t done that yet.”
You made me want to learn the rest from you;
I floated home on clouds the day we met.
My pantoum was totally different (about a cat!) but here I can see how the construct of repetition really makes for an effective piece. I know you are writing about falling in love with someone, but when you combine the title of your poem (first heartbreak) with the drumming insistence that comes from the repetition of your lines (where this guy just seems to be after one thing), the sense that something is going to go wrong – and that you are going to be hurt – is too strong to ignore. A great use of this form!
Thanks Anne – This was inspired by the first girl I ever kissed … and yes, it ended in tears (for me at least). The one great thing about the repetitive cycling of the pantoum is that almost physical back-beat rhythm that is obtained, and anything having to do with a heartbeat can make a strong impression. Thank you for the kind words. 🙂