If I get a cell-
and I’m saying IF –
I’m very popular with the warden crowd –
you can’t outfit my cell in any more gold
than one of the Louies –
you know, the big ones before all the
head-chopping – what’d they call them?
Gillotines? Our friend Macron, he
should be scared they don’t bring that back.

So, let’s all take a bow of silence
for the real criminals.
What’d I say? A bow? Why not, they act like
royalty, maybe they could get a pardon for
their sins. Knock on King Charlie’s door
and demand a pardon.
No one’s ever going to believe
I’m the biggest sinner.
Not when you’ve got chumps like –
what’s up with Prince Harry?
Little Harry out writing nasty things about
his family?
What a shame, what a shame.
If that were my son, I’d
cut him off.
Talk bad about your own father?
No security detail for you!
That’s only fair.

And, I’d be the most secure in prison.
I don’t need a gang.
Secret Service
would be there in the shower, which –
I’m in talks – would be private.
And, maybe I’d get a suite. A prison suite.
I could still get things done.
I’ve been promising my many, many friends
as soon as I have time, I could write
my memoirs.