another deadbolt sliding
keys jingling
avoidant lover opens the door
shuffles in
but keeps eyes glued to the floor
avoiding sudden movements
I am the villain again and again

I am the villain that breaks the silence
daring to ask for conversation
or even
the slightest acknowledgment
a hint of accountability
end up repeatedly receiving requests for
a little bit of time to think

of course, as any proper perpetrator
I always give them time
days weeks months go by
while they decide whether they want me
evaluate whether there is more
to be squeezed
if anything is left of me

is there an expected apology
in between the professions
of love and appreciation
swearing to the ends of breath
that I’m important to them
in the same way as AAA
happy to get paid until someone needs a tow

those keys
to my heart and home
sound flimsy when they kiss the counter
front door becomes plastic
closed behind them for the last time
they leave an empty promise to reach out soon
wondering, don’t you trust me?