Panic
Panic
As you rush
Already knowing what
To expect but
Trying not to expect the worst
There were no bells
No whistles
No way to have known
Expect to be present
No indication to say
Words that could’ve given
Peace
Just panic
The Tropical Moon
A tropical moon,
giant and orange,
spread a canopy
of light across the lake,
dwarfing the people
on the pier.
Two kids in a jeep
came around the corner
and panicked at the
glorious sight and then
drove off the road.
The boy’s life was spared
but the girl’s breastbone
was driven like an icicle
into her heart.
12
whew!!!!!!
The last one. I used six of the words
Glory spills into the lake from the sky
by way of the moon’s spare yet lovely light
A canopy of reeds bends over
hiding the silvery reflection.
No need to panic
A quick glance at the sky
confirms moon still reigns
supreme in the night sky
Heart on sleeve
So I will wear my heart on my sleeve
And give it to the boy who passes by me
He will notice not and go away
And I’ll cry my eyes out all night all day
I’ll sabotage him of breaking my heart
I’ll try to forget him with chocolate ice cream and lemon tart.
The next day I’ll wake up new
Fresh as morning dew
Dust him off my shoulder,
Brush off the memories like autumn leaves
And stitch a new heart on my sleeve.
Seeing Through Fingerprints
Life is more smudgy.
The lights are softer.
Letters are constantly out of focus.
Despite pushing them further up,
And moving your screen closer,
The letters are still smudged.
It feels like a constant sleepy,
In the corner of your eye.
Stuck and annoying.
Of course your shirt is never enough
Often trying to clean them
Makes the smudges more pronounced.
Even once they are clean,
Shortly the world is slightly softer
And it begins again.
Hour 9: Perpetua 11
1. Turn me inside out, then turn me, wear me like a coat, hold your secrets in my pockets, keep me hidden until winter.
2. I am summer fury, let the heat dismantle you, let the memories burden you with sweaty nights with dreams about the way we used to be.
3. I caught your lies on my tongue, you won’t say it, I won’t say it, we did explain, in the sea, when you were drowning me in all your attempts to get the world from out of my body.
4. You used to dip your feet in the pool because you were afraid something might drag you down if you jumped straight in, isn’t there some magic to fear nothing at all, but everything at the same time?
5. I saw those pictures you drew of those girl’s vaginas, laughing as though they would all magically appear in front of you, you thought it was so funny, I cried and thought only deadly things.
6. What was time but a little box on your shelf, you told me to open it, to reveal all the things that would be and never be, that were, and never were.
7. She kissed you around midnight, thought you would turn into a prince, the frog gets the last laugh.
8. I drew maps of your body, a way to define your lungs and your heart, until you ripped the picture up and told me to draw the way around your home, the way to your home and back to mine, because the distance would define us, not anything else.
9. I had dreams last night of this serpent killing you, fucking you, and putting you back to sleep, I couldn’t sleep after that, but damn, you snored all night and woke up the next day and said it was the best sleep you ever had. I know I’m crazy now.
10. Come into my midnight agony, watch me play with your emotions, facebook is my game, watch me not reply to your message for 30 days and come crawling back like some bad joke that didn’t land so I try again. I am all and everything especially after you pretend I am what you want. So come one, come all, come on, come back.
11. i play with rituals, hoping to resurrect you from death or absence, I am a constant storm, readying my form to please you. In this perpetual cycle of grief and mischief, I’ve come to maintain the light in your cavern of darkness, come and linger, this won’t last long.
12 // blueprints
I get it from my mother
he tells me as he sways
on the kerb
I look at him
that vacant stare
and think of those instructions tucked away
inside each and every cell
and I shake my head and wonder
how many of them had read that page
how many of them had built up those proteins
that made him want more and more
to the point where he threatened the barmaid
and knocked over two drinks
how many of them had worked away
at him until he split
how many of them were like his mother’s
Poem 12-Halfway
The halfway mark
A canopy of words
Protecting me
My breastbone aching from sitting up
Panic shadowing me
Chasing me
The moon whispering to keep going
There will be glory at the end
My body would give it all
For ten hours sleep
And a home-cooked meal
But I must soldier on
Grab my words and beat the monsters down
Lunge with verse and attack with phrasing
Another 12 to go.
Grimeon
Grimeon rose from icy depths,
His breath stagnant as dead lilies.
Legs frozen from winter’s orbit.
Wings iced to his back.
He shook as I stood in awe,
Sniffed my perfume wafting
Through cold spring air.
I dare not catch his eye.
Oh, mighty dragon!