A Modern Response to Euripides’ The Medea

Jason messed with the wrong Corinthian
in that ancient play about the dangerously
pissed off Medea, the “X” of your nightmares.
Jason starts knockin’ boots with Creon’s
daughter, a genuine princess with a royal
bank account balance. Jason up and leaves
Medea and his own babies behind to
marry that spoiled brat of a princess so
he could hook it up with King Creon’s
power and financial means of success.
Well, the shit started gettin’ real when Medea
set the plan in motion to take out the royalty
and her own two boys of tender age to boot.
That girl was straight trippin’–wouldn’t hear
anything the sisters had to say bout
doin’ the right and ladylike thing.
Medea was straight out of her head when
she poisoned the princess and the king,
and murdered her own flesh and blood–
two snot-nosed little brothers with smart mouths.
Then, just to make sure those missing marbles was a lost cause,
she scooped up the kids’ dead bodies
and took them with her to God knows where
just so that rotten Jason couldn’t have ‘em.
Lord, if that ain’t a revenge tale for the ages.
Chicks and dudes been lovin’ each other to death
since at least 431 B.C., huh?
That’s some crazy ass shit right there.”