The Poetry Marathon

my ———– feels dead

never full of life

but ——- me to ———

So. Much. ———–!

practically ————me

leaving me ——– like

i ——– 

i ———- ——– …

my job

it seems 

is cleaning

cleaning up

shit

literally

from my

furry sick babies

figuratively 

cleaning up

shit from others

the people around me 

leaving

all their shit

for me to clean 

always filthy

forcing smiles

i scoop

i scour

poop

so many closets

throughout my life

the one full

of christmas presents

i secretly opened 

one with films

of vintage family

i never got to watch

the closet 

my boyfriend 

stayed hidden in

the closet

that kept me safe

from the next one

same closet

catching 

all my pennies

adding up

waiting

to set me free

closet with a mouse

mother scared to death

seeing her frying pan flying

the closet my best kitten

kept her litter box in

my first away adult summer

the last closet

full of old toys

i never got to play with

the pillowcase

tiny safety pins

old magazines

my mother screaming

running through the house

in agony

trying to hold

her floppy twisted arm

a gift from my father

pillowcase from my pillow

third grade me

was dreaming on

now pins to it’s twin

lined with glossy stiff paper

encircling her pain

my little fingers fasten

sharp pins of safety

still a bit groggy

until I see dad

who scares me

wide awake 

who scares hurt her

both of us

saying nothing

again in the 

emergency room

what is love?

a tiny kitten

giant meows

found by you

broken leg 

snuggling you

such soft paws

fluffy tail

surrounds you 

while you both sleep

your arms

gently entwine

her too 

blueness

surrounds

them

and yet

they dance

in it

together

melancholia 

is my master

memories 

longing lost love

rudely ripped away

just as it was

beginning

such sadness 

memories

drown me

can I be

forgiven 

hidden regret

colors everything

around me

wistful

fleeting 

glimpses

of joy

stolen happiness

leaves my past

forever gone

away

with him

our secret

i’ve paid for

with 

the rest

of

my life

when lovers leave

sometimes you cry

(but you don’t know why)

you cried before they left

they see you cry

when lovers leave

they do not care

running away so happily

you watch them go

reaching out

when lovers leave

your hand alone floating

sometimes you sigh

(but you don’t know why)

you feel so relieved

when lovers leave

trembling 

I crawl

     towards

     beautiful

          sparkling

          darkness

               trying

               desperately 

                    not

                    to fall

                         into

                         the void

                              of despair

(who did it?)

Who Stole My Heart??

AGAIN!

little soft feet

pitter~n~patter

<multiplying>

as they race

towards me

opening up

nummy treats

~pppfffft~

my love stolen

then given back

heavy with joy

as I watch them eat

by my wiggly bare feet