My Bad

He did it on purpose…
driving me crazy to feed his ego.
Oh, how clear I see it now,
thirty years hence.

“Call me! I dare you!
Call me on that number
listed online. I’ll listen,
then remain proud
behind your back.”

Oh, love, it’s tempting.
We of the poetic bent
believe in love despite
our perceived insanity.

“She thinks she knows my soul.”

I know your soul,
precious son of…

“I won,” he’ll think.
“she hates me.”

Son of the universe,
I don’t hate you.
I resonated with you.

Like all of us,
I wanted it to be love.

So glad to finally see
this isn’t love.
No… just the physics
of human vibration.

Two soul bubbles intersected
on an identical wavelength,
amplifying the pattern in me
to the point that I felt it –
like electricity across my chest.

Strangest thing ever,
but it wasn’t love.

You’re right… I barely knew you,
but the vibrations were
something like that Brian Adams song –
the one in the snow that you told me about

the last time we saw us together.

Yes, you won, my love.
You win.

I’m gone. Finally! Really!

Took me forever to figure it out…

NOT!

Oh brother! I was in a sad mood.

He’s not like that. I know he’s not like that. Sometimes I wish I could give myself a reason, as do all in this situation. I have to laugh at myself when I recall these moods. Like one part of my mind telling the part that guides my heart that it’s entirely wrong and irrational. Let it be. Observe it. All things are for one reason or another – none of which anyone will ever really know.

 

Freedom

Ego!

Ergo I might fall for some stupidity or another.
How my mind works to fool me into fantasy,
imagining what could have been, but isn’t.

Pretending for the sake of verse.
I feel it and think it’s real.
It’s not! It never was.
Well, maybe somewhat…
But… but… but…

Like a toy the child once
played with for a moment, I was.
I was the toy. He was the toy.
Games, games, games!
Am I not too old for this?

No, never…
mind games I play all alone
to convince myself of my value.
And the worst part of it all?
This isn’t even a good poem!!

Stardust is Made of Cheese

“Stardust is made of cheese
asleep in its own shoes,”
my mind repeats,
hoping for a little of each.

Sleep first. That glorious time
when movies and music play,
and I, the star, am the hero
hoping for a resolution.

Then cheese, and showers,
and shoes, and tea.
Water with lime and mint
as I play examining stardust.

The Grapes of Wrath

He must not like books,
but he thinks he likes me.
Strange fool that he is.

Or was… Really?
Is that still the reason
for all this gang stalking?

All upset after 40 years
because I refused to
wave in your parade?

Did Harry come to Megan
and say “We’re getting married.”
one day, just out of the blue?

Prince of nothing! How dare you impose
your son of a hag everyone knows
upon my life and my world!

Your right to the pursuit of happiness
is NOT actually, on any level
meant to allow your pursuit of me.

My name is Joy, yes, a word
similar to happiness…
So, did the AG say it was OK?

Does it exist in some federal policy
somewhere in the banal depths
of that haint white house?

Maybe it does. Maybe I was woven
into the pork fat of some
well fettered bill.

You people! You pests!
You infantile brats without a shred
of sanity! Just couldn’t let me be.

Gator Bait

Ooh! Is that a gator there,
waiting to be fed?
A pile of fish
to the other side
writhing like ancient snakes.

It’s a party!
On both sides of the divide.
Better hide! Better hide!

Lest you be gator bait!

Rain, Beautiful Rain!

Then, hide from the rain!
I shout to those whose job
is to keep their jobs
at all costs to we the people.

You, whose umbrella policies
invade and degrade the lives
of those who pay your way.

Hide from the rain!
It’s coming.

The Wall

This was my last dream of you and me.
A bed in a field of flowers
out of her sight, and away from him.

Just you.

Just me.

Just a bed in a field of flowers.

Just now I woke from a nap, and as usual
dreamed of you, walking past me in silence
taking my hand in stealth as she looks elsewhere.

You brushed past my shoulder, too close
in a crowded botanical, pulled me aside
for a kiss behind the geraniums.

Just you.

Just me.

Just a wall of beauty.

Any City

What city is complete without apple trees and honey?
Sweet things for the sweet among us…

Do hardened walls and concrete stalls serve life?

Yes, momentarily…. enough to get some rest in the midst
of clang and clatter.

My Precious Ones!

Days and days of joy
to kiss my baby boy
and watch him grow.

My precious baby girl
the same, with eyes
that light my heart.

Oh, babes!
Each moment with you
was a gift of happiness.

To hear your voice
To see your sweet faces!
“There comes my babies!”

Shadow Men

Out of my way, you three armless worms!
Your speech offends with lies and fables!
Manipulative oafs! All of you! Swearing
upon the falsehood of your faith.

I remember the in-between, and your
taunts to my king of kings, the one
who carried upon his back
the weight of our despair.

And now, you say “God bless…”
as if your words don’t fall to
chains and ashes amid the
governance of hell.

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