Elites, being elite, and clearly special
by virtue of…

I’m not entirely sure, but whatever.

They’re special, because
they said so, and so it is.

We, the people, need to learn
to accept reality.

And so it shall be.

We, the people, need to get with the program!

Sadly, the program made by educated men in the late 1700s
is obviously outdated, and unrealistic.

May I suggest, therefore, a centrally protruding appendage to the
Declaration of Independence to follow the original:

• We, the elite people, of the United States of America, as the law makers and creators of the world economy, hereby declare the clear and apparent fact that we are not subjects to the laws that we create in our unique effort to control our tax paying subjects. The Bill of Rights and all Constitutional Amendments apply to us in the same way that they apply to these little people. [Elites, you can take out the word “little” if you want, just to make it not look so haughty.] We, the elite people, are, in reality, above the antlike infestation of human subjects that plague our country and our world, that infect our health, and that otherwise destroy both our economy of choice and our planetary environment. Therefore, the statutes necessary to herd and control these subjects do not apply to us. As elites, we require special rights and privileges to enable us to create peace and prosperity for ourselves so that we can contain and control the non-lawmaker class over which we are, as elites, entirely sovereign. Our sovereignty over humanity is ordained by God to us and to our families in perpetuity. We therefore declare our independence from all federal, state, and local statutes that do not suit our needs, whatever they may be.
• Because we so enjoyed the peace and privacy in public spaces afforded to us by the COVID lockdowns, we, the elite, hereby declare that two full weeks of each year shall be declared “elite weeks” in which all human subjects shall be locked down, with the exception of essential workers who will work from locations predetermined by our “Elite Rights and Privileges” NGO, funded by our tax paying subjects. Let’s face it, no one enjoys sitting next to a fat lady and her screaming kids at a beach-front sandwich bar. We, the elites, deserve freedom from exposure to ugly people.
• The right to own slaves shall be reinstated exclusively for we, the elites, who may purchase, sell, or obtain by any means necessary, non-lawmaker subjects of any age at our discretion for any reason. Said enslaved human subjects shall be allocated amongst ourselves at our sole discretion, for any necessary purpose, not to exclude our sexual gratification or that of any other world level elite to whom we reserve the right to sell, either wholly or temporarily, said enslaved human subject.
• In our ongoing effort to control the infestation of human subjects on this planet, we, the elites hereby reserve the right to obtain human subjects from any worldwide location at our sole discretion for the purpose of recreational hunting, wherein we shall set them free inside an enclosed ranch style setting during elite week for our entertainment. Survivors shall be maintained in caged housing plots until their eventual capture and deaths provided as a service to the new world order.

The above, when printed on high quality parchment, and signed by all those who require independence from statutory responsibility, shall be declared directly to the people and appended to the Declaration of Independence.

We, the people, recognize this obvious reality as nothing new, and so would like for it to be made available for all our understandings so that we know not to contact the police or the FBI when an elite breaks any law designed to apply only to the non-lawmaker class of Americans. Let’s recognize the truth, as Americans, that the elites we elect to run our government, and who are paid by our tax dollars, then become our kings and queens in perpetuity. They and their families are elevated to above the law status, and they deserve it. Let’s allow them to recognize their elite position in writing so that we can all be on the same page with no unrealistic expectations of justice being served when an elite breaks the law. It’s the healthy way to go!

Yes, of course, let’s all worship the elite just as we are taught to do. To hell with democracy! To hell with civil rights! To hell with that “in God we trust” propaganda! Let’s crown them all, and cry when their parade passes as we catch a glimpse of their self-ordained glory!

No, actually… let’s not. Let’s wait to see which members of Congress actually have the courage to do their jobs.