Our Friends Agree
(Hour 8 – Half Marathon 2021)

After being friends
Since childhood
After your boyfriend
Caught you
With another guy
Just after he brought up the possibility of marriage
And told you he could no longer be with you,
And you agreed he just wasn’t capable of keeping up with you.
We would talk for hours
Usually on the phone
You would tell me your thoughts
Deconstructing what was right
And wrong
About him
About you
About the two of you together.
When we were together
Everyone thought we would make a great couple
They never understood why we were not a “we.”
We never acted on it.
We kept our emotional distance
We thought it better to remain friends
And we talked for hours about right and wrong
One night after a few drinks
You invited me in
And we finally perfected our relationship
Elevating from friendship.
Since then you have
Avoided seeing me
While seeing other guys
But we continue talking on the phone
Where we engage in lengthy conversations
One night I brought up the subject of us
You agreed that is okay with you
That I am in love with you
And that perhaps you loved me
Or could love me
Or might be in love with me in some way.
But after that you continued going out
Letting them buy you drinks
Finally finishing with one more one night stand
Our friends think we would make a great couple
Though you are extroverted
And I don’t get out much.
I am a classic introvert.
You texted me recently
With a photograph
Of you topless on the beach
With a guy in the background
Hardened in his speedo bikini suit
Bringing you a drink
I don’t know if we are playing games,
Pretending we are playing tag
Or something more or less
I would like to get on the same page
And tell everyone it is no or yes
I am tired of guessing.
I know you are very good at telling me
How you feel and what you believe is the truth
You show me often your ability
To understand people and their motives
But when it comes to us
You want me to guess.
I don’t know if you think
I will outlast this phase
(one that I am going through?
Or one that you are going through?)
Until you are ready to settle down
Or if you think you will find someone better.
And if I asked you for just another night of fun
Would that be better?
Would we then be able to settle down?
Do you think, I’m really in love with you?
Is that the issue that stands between us
A concrete wall between us.
If we could only have one
Could it be you?
Would it be me?