Downward Spiral
send up the flares
it’s dark again
Hour 24 – Part Two: The Only Time I’m Home is With Your Hands On My Hips, Descending
Part Two: The Only Time I’m Home is With Your Hands On My Hips, Descending
I typically live at the centerfold of misery,
some semblance of my mind stapling the pages of my body
to the rest of these articles of dissociation.
Yet, at your touch, this body is a home again
for every portion of me that quakes and thunders,
withdrawing all reason to run from the sound.
Your fingers trace bone, nails trailing with brutal beauty
simply a moment in their wake and the tension
brings my skeleton once more to tremble
at the altar of your home, too. This palace of flesh
both parallel and perpendicular to mine as we collide.
Darling, my darling, what happens when our houses
are one? When they are transferred through
the rhythm that you beat into my thighs?
Will I still know my own? Or is your touch the only key
to the threshold of this being? No matter. I beckon you.
Open.
Home
Home
As I lie exhausted on the couch,
I dwell in slovenly comfort
During the final hours
Of another satisfyingly
frustrating day.
I know not every task was completed,
Yet something was checked off
The never-ending
“To-Do” list of life.
I find comfort around me
And think,
“Home is where the heart is.”
Clothes strewn on the floor.
Books piled in every nook.
Dog curled on my lap.
TV murmurs in the background.
Kids stomping the stairs.
Dishes stacked precariously.
Mismatched socks seeking lonely shoes.
Toys in every corner.
Wife reading in her favorite chair.
My coffee cup in hand.
I exhale and let the day fall from my shoulders.
I have found comfort in the clutter.
Never a Stranger
Never a Stranger
And even after all the doubts and the backsliding and the falling down in a myriad of ways
When I enter His house he welcomes me with open arms, clothing me with His love
He turns my eyes toward Him, away from the others and their curious stares
I go to tell Him I don’t know how He’ll forgive me this time
before I even finish He says He already Has.
Hour 23 (2021)
I like my poetry
like my favorite snack
Cheesy
Satisfying
and sometimes
a little gooey.
(Hour 24 of 24) “the best place to be”
The solitude of a simple forest cabin at the water’s edge,
Or the luxury of a glass penthouse overlooking the city lights.
It does not matter where I may be,
An eclectic, well-filled library is what I need,
A chaise longue and good, hot coffee,
Right by a warm, crackling fireplace.
For all I ask is a good book,
And a light to read her by.
© 2021 S Phua
Hour 24 – Take Me to Maine
I want to plant my feet into
The earth until they take root.
I want to stay here, in this
Place that feels like coming
Home, and never leave again.
I want to live inside of that
Sunrise in Seboomook, relive
The night before where we
Went looking for a moose and
Turned into excited children
When we found three. I want
That awe back, that peace and
Quiet of being in the middle of
Nowhere with no cell reception.
Give me back the days in Acadia,
The feeling of being on top of the
World, looking over the ocean
Atop Cadillac Mountain.
I can’t keep tearing myself to
Shreds every time I cross over
The state line away from my peace.
Hour 24: Good Morning, Witch Haus!
In these slight hours
when the sky beings stir
and streak the clouds
with wakeful orange
light peeps in
through slanted blinds
and curtain parts
like a child
excited for the day
As the world lights up
I am cool and asleep
in a canopy cave
mossed over in teal tulle
while I rest
the little pekingese
rolls on the greyed carpet
the border collie trots
lovingly behind her human
with one watchful eye out
for fallen morsels of toast
I wake in the late morning
meeting someone in the kitchen
to entertain the shared daily curiosities:
“Whatcha up to today?”
“How were your dreams?”
The walls are draped
with pothos, floral arrangements
and affirmations
because we need them
like this house
to hold well big hearts
buzzing with intentions
connection
creativity
freedom
healing
growth
magic
play
love
Outside of
Inside of
our home.
Testimonial for 2021 Poetry Marathon
Thank you Caitlin and Jacob for pulling us through another Poetry Marathon!
It was one of my least stressful marathons i attended despite a very stressful health situation of my son that creeped up a day before the marathon. I guess, the fact that i knew that i can try my best and no one can take that away from me, kept me going. I am glad to have finished the marathon.
Cheers fellow marathoners!