Recipe for Heart

There are endless books about the anatomy of the heart
but not a one that tells you
how to cook it.

How to cut out a heart and eat it? A rabbit heart, a deer heart, bison heart, or hey, even a human heart if you’re an evil witch or perhaps a descendent of Countess Bathory.

A recipe for a properly cooked heart is what I want.
How long to marinate and in what spices. Can I deep fry the while thing, or serve it raw as ceviche? Perhaps a nice rub and a slow barbecue in a wood fired stove would serve it best. Would you like yours sous-vide or perhaps in a nice hearty stew? Slow baked? Steamed? Broiled? Boiled? Sauteed? Seared? Charbroiled? Flambe? Poached? Roasted? Rotisserie? Smoked?

Or should I just shove that sucker in a microwave for 3 minutes on high?

2 thoughts on “Recipe for Heart

  1. …though reading a historic journal by an old Canadian trapper, I learned one can simply pinch out the heart of any little deep-chested creature as small as a squirrel. Skin and bones are so delicate that determined human fingers apparently pop through flesh like plastic wrap.

    No cooking instructions, though earlier editions of “The Joy of Cooking” have a very practical description of skinning a squirrel with stylish diagrams of a lady’s elegant hand in gloves doing the deed. Elsewhere in the book they say hearts are tougher the bigger and older they are, and usually need a long marinade or stewing.

    In any case, this toothy little gem stirred up my brain. Though I wouldn’t post it in your online dating profile.


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