Five years, light and laughter fill my eyes.
Airy and breathy, like feathers floating upon the wind.
Hope swells like cresting ocean waves
and dreams rise higher than the desert mountain tops of memory.
The stars and moon never out of reach for the innocent dreamer within me.
Dazzling lights shinning down, head over feet, feet over head,
flying high, tumbling down, landing solid on legs of steel,
while dreaming of weighted gold around my neck.
Can feel it, taste it, long for it,
but some dreams are never meant to be.
Fireworks exploding high into the sky,
bursting brilliant and magical colors just for me.
But things aren’t always what they seem to be.

Ten years, sorrow and suspicion fill my eyes.
Unrelenting and shadowy, like trees moving in the wind on a moonless night.
Escaping reality in front of moving images that fuel more dreams,
and treading upon demon heads as all of heaven looked down.
The stars and moon waiting to be explored for the relentless dreamer within me.
Zero gravity calling down, wanting so much to fly,
leaving Earth’s atmosphere behind.
A rocket jet set as my permanent backpack, hope set on a cosmic summer adventure.
Can feel it, taste it, long for it,
but some dreams can never be.
Prayers and signs, signs and prayers abounded all around,
but things aren’t always what they seem to be.

Twenty years, forgiveness and freedom fill my eyes.
Clear-eyed and glowing, like luminous skin bathed in the balm of Gilead.
New faith and hope blooming, new paths and journeys forged,
grasping and ever reaching for viridescent light.
The stars and moon becoming the eyes of heaven for the impossible dreamer within me.
A thousand lives to live within one heart, demanding thousands of voices to call my name,
seeking paths of crimson silk in every land I walk.
Though every mission I take leads me further away from my deepest dream.
Can feel it, taste it, long for it,
but some dreams are told to wait.
Die to self, die to dreams, awaiting their resurrection,
but things aren’t always what they seem to be.

Thirty years, heartbreak and rejection fill my eyes.
Confused and grieving, like a widow’s child.
Unconditional love searing my heart in two, the husband of my heart forbidden to me,
speaking words of unrequited love and infidelity.
The stars and moon hidden by a celestial cloak from the romantic dreamer within me.
Rejecting his rejection I moved forward, living in a land fixed between two worlds,
embraced by some, unseen by others.
Though love is still unknown, it’s far from a mystery.
Want to feel it, taste it, long for it,
but some dreams are meant to die.
All the why’s parade in a mocking line, “Why wasn’t I good enough?”
but things aren’t always what they seem to be.

Forty years, new hope and longing fill my eyes.
Determined and wise, like ancient fiery flint.
The echoes of every goodbye and every loss sing as a chorus, cheering me on,
reminding me there is no failure, for I do and do and do, never just try.
The stars and moon shine down, reigniting the impossible dreamer within me.
Setting sail to a familiar land, I break free from every blinding shackle,
seasons of abundance and providence awaiting me.
Long dead dreams beckon with resurrected fingers, while new dreams are born.
Can feel it, taste it, long for it,
though some dreams may tarry, not all stay dead.
Though sacrifices were made and all feels lost,
things aren’t always what they seem to be.

12th out 12