I walk
The streets laid out before me like a thousand unbidden promises.
Which way?
I could walk down here toward
The little antique shops which sell dolls without limbs;
Faintly scratched vinyl records;
A copy of “The Merchant of Venice” missing its last page;
Somebody else’s life.
But I don’t want somebody else’s life. I want mine. That life I had with you.
I could go to the park.
Lying in the sun, knitting daisy chains and talking about the future that we both knew was scorched by lies.
I could go home.
But home is not down these streets. That is where your home is; your home with her.
You call out as you see her, but as she turns her head to cross the road, you know it is not she.
I will go home.
I will lie tonight on the back garden and look up at the same sky that is above you. And wonder if you are watching it too.
I write a pattern in the stars that tells how this girl met this boy. And though he wasn’t hers
He became hers.
I am that girl.
It turns out that you were never really that boy.