The Poetry Marathon

Breathe in
Let goodness fill your lungs
Let hope rejuvenate your body
Let wonder enter your brain
Breathe out
Let hatred leave you lungs
Let anxiety flood out of your body
Let doubt exit your brain

Where were you when I needed you?
When I called your name for hours,
When I knew you would be the only one to under stand,
When I only wanted you,
Where were you?

“Mom, is this how love is suppose to look?
Do dad’s mean words show his love for you?
Is his hand supposed to make your skin turn colors?
Is love supposed to make you cry?”

“No, baby girl.
This is not love.
This is a monster.
A monster I can’t get away from.”

You were red.
You could light up the room,
Everyone liked you,
You were a warm person.

I was blue.
I was the dark corner of the room,
Everyone avoided me,
I was a cold person.

We were purple.
I felt warmer in a room, but you felt restrained in the dark.
More people said hi to me than ever before, but more people started to feel indifferent about you.

You soon became red again.
And I became blue.

My eyes are light blue
My hair is brown
I never thought I was pretty
Until now.

I am not your puppet.
You have no right to tell me how to feel

I am not your puppet.
You have no right to tell me how to live my life

I am not your puppet.
You have no right to choose my friends

I am not your puppet.
Yet I let you treat me like a puppet.

You said you were sorry
You said you would never do it again
You hugged me
You tried to comfort me

You said it was all my fault
You said if I had done everything right I would be fine
You said you were doing me a favor
You said this is why I don’t have friends

You said I couldn’t leave
You said no one would like me except you
You said I was worthless
You said I was nothing without you

However,
I don’t listen to you anymore

Wait!
I love you, please don’t leave.
I know I never told until now.
But I was scared.
Scared that you didn’t love me.
Or that you did.
So please don’t leave.

These words bubble in my throat,
But can’t burst through my lips.

One Two, I don’t know what to do
Three Four, I can’t take it anymore
Five Six, I know I am sick
Seven Eight, I can’t escape
Nine Ten, I am stuck in my head

Let me fix you
Let me love you
Let me see you
Let me hold you
Let me comfort you
Let me know you
Let me rely on you