‘We’re gathered here today,’ he says
(you try not to roll your eyes)
you’ve better things to do, you’re sure
than to hear him eulogise
Like blowing out candles, or ruffling hair
and trying to make the most
of all the things you can get away with
now that you are a ghost
Photo by Eli Solitas on Unsplash
Hello,
Your craft and succinct writing are powerful. You created vivid images as well as keen emotions for me as a reader.
The “eulogise” and “you are a ghost” references made me shudder, but the “lighter” rolled eyes and ruffling hair set the perfect counterbalance — I can definitely relate to your sarcasm and frustration. Why do people want to force others to gather? Whether well-meaning, glib, or uninformed (perhaps a bit of all), these imposed actions are ultimately empty.
Bruh, this is wonderfully spooky and invitingly disruptive at the same time. Lmao 😂 If i didn’t know what it feels like to be a ghost, i certainly do now. Awesome! lmao Even saying that is spooky.
What a twist! This really showcases your skill and echoes your experience in micro-fiction; creating a strikingly memorable world in a few lines. You are in control throughout – walking us through our expectation of what usually happens during a funeral, but then adding in that delicious twist where you’re the ghost. Really accomplished work, dude!