Lovely laughing ladies
delight lonely little lovebirds
loving under light pole.
Laughter lightens lonesome souls
and love lives long lives.
24 Poems ~ 24 Hours
Lovely laughing ladies
delight lonely little lovebirds
loving under light pole.
Laughter lightens lonesome souls
and love lives long lives.
I enjoyed that! Playful, sweet.
Thank you, Davita Joie. 🙂
🙂
I always enjoy light verse and alliteration is a joy.
Ordinarily I welcome delight, but do you think you can get that one out of there? It diminishes the delightful by its difference.
I always welcome constructive criticism; it’s how I improve. Thank you, Paul Robert Sanford, the comedian of The Poetry Marathon.
Darn it! I don’t know how to go back to my post to edit it. I’ll edit on my files for future use. Gracias. 🙂
Martina, lovely alliteration. delight somehow breaks the flow – maybe some other word, in case you are thinking of changing it.
I love lyrical poems and I enjoyed this alliteration-and the irony of the title 🙂 Well done. At times, the flow was interrupted-agree with Paul…delight.stops.it Delight is such a hard word for a soft terms…and often overused. Otherwise, the poem was playful, light and loved !
This trips off the tongue and the alliteration keeps the reader dancing: also the smart work with ‘lives’ and er ‘lives’ at the very end stops us from getting complacent and brings everything together beautifully!
Thank you all for your input. True, even I didn’t quite feel comfortable with ‘delight.’ I used it because it’s a favorite ‘word-play’ in my family.
Yes, DElight is giving me a headache. Thank you, Vijaya, for bringing that to my attention.
Gr8 liquid sound, lilting light, love it, Martina!