Click, Whoosh! the flame sprang to life
Click, zwoop! the flame died again
On and off like a switch,
not really serving a purpose,
it was mindless, focused
And as you watched it flicker
something stirred in the darkness.
A feeling, somewhat profound,
somewhat dangerous, but without sound.
No words described the need you felt
To make the lighter click.
Click, Whoosh! the flame in your mind sprang
Click, zwoop! the flame died once again.
Hard-hitting use of onomatopoeia.
I love this one! it kind of sucks the reader into its rhythm (sorry for the weird wording but I didn’t know how to express it better ^^;)
I really liked this. It reminded me of the time I set my parents stairs on fire (not purposefully I might add. I wrote about this on my blog a few years ago: https://dscoremans.com/2017/11/01/never-play-with-fire%E2%80%8B/) Valkyrie Kerry beat me too it, but the onomatopoeic language is well used.
The ‘click’ at the end of ‘To make the lighter click’ creates a sense of eerie finality.
Brilliant use of sound and imagery…