HOUR 5
WHAT OF THE CHILD?
My colleague happily announced
her pregnancy.
Her doctor advised a genetic test
for high probability,
of chromosomal aberration.
She proudly told us,
she didn’t need one.
She was ready.
Everyone applauded.
She was brave, she was virtuous.
Not one had a handicapped child.
She drank it all in,
yes she was all of that,
and more.
And I asked,
what of the child?
A lifetime of disability,
of frustration, of sorrow, of heartbreak.
Striving to be like their siblings,
their peers,
and falling short.
Of never being independent,
told what to do, where to go.
To never drive, go to a prom,
to be a wife,
and a mother.
Slowly the siblings leave,
and then permanently the parents.
The child turns old, lonely in a group home,
and dies among strangers.
I know, I have seen firsthand.
We have a Downs Syndrome child.
and dread her future,
when we are gone.
Kind Regards
I enjoyed your poem! It struck a chord since I had a cousin who had a downs syndrome child!
The future is bleak, as encapsulated by your poem!
Thank you for such a profound and thoughtful poem.
Well done!
Two sides of the coin.
Thank you Anwar! This is a sensitive issue, for most people it flies in the face of accepting all children as gifts, especially among the religious in the US. They may be gifts to us, but are they gifts to themselves? Is your cousin’s DS child still around?
Indeed it is Stef! This is my side – pondering the future of the handicapped towards the end of their life.
My heart goes out to you with worries for your child. My daughter has autism among many other mental disabilities and I fret about her future. I’m working really hard on this with support groups and therapy.
Only someone with a handicapped child can see this and indeed you are doing the right thing with support groups and therapy – both if which we do. As we grow older, it gets worse. I wrote this because in today’s world, people expect you to be only joyful with a handicapped child, and no one wants to know your worries. My daughter IS a blessing and a joy (as I wrote in the poem NATASHA), to us, but what about her?
My daughter brings depth to my life and I’m so thankful to have her. We are fortunate with available resources to assist her development. And mine is NATALIA 😊
Well done!! This poem is heartbreaking but holds so many truths. I have worked in the not-for-profit for many years and had siblings who dealt with challenges. This poem stirs a lot of emotions and I really enjoyed the flow of the poem. Beautiful!
Thank you so much for reading the poem and for your kind words! It was a difficult one for me to write as these days parents are not supposed to feel like that, only joy and blessing. Natasha is both that and a very precious child. All the more reason I worry about her future.
Parents are people too Nandhini…filled with sorrow, disapointment but yes, also extreme joy and pride when their child exceeds expectations…Take it from someone who has walked a similar path to your daughter (brain tumour survivor and hydrocephalus champion),,, It helps us when we can see our parents as people who are always trying to do their best and being honest too!
Thank you Ingrid! All the best of luck and prayers for you and your child!