Heartbreaker
I had expected more, heart-breaker
someone dangerous, a taker
but you were lovely from the beginning
I never realized my heart broken meant you were winning.
Thirst and Heat and Madness (Hour Seventeen)
I sought in him comfort,
Acceptance,
Love,
And adoration,
Things that were scarce
In my desert soul.
But that he held these things for me,
And kept these things for me,
Was a mirage,
Of thirst and heat and madness.
The American Dream
Politics in Americaaaaaa…..
Aaaaah………
Wasting my time with it.
Wondering who selects whom
As we pretend to vote
Our
Selection
In a completely
Fascist
Election.
I have to go to bed.
Chaos
Met you in a place
Where craziness ran rampant
The king of all disruption
Your name was Chaos
In a few post
You felt like a brother
We slammed the forum
And fought together
You we’re my friend and rival
A brother, most important
Yet you lied and hid
Behind the thickly vieled anonymity
Two years of friendship
Not a single thing I knew
When the chance came
I grasped the hold of it
You banned me for a day
And I left for life
Yet you were the one
Behaving like I was dead
You know not
The affect of your action
Because I his too
Behind a strong wall
I miss you even now
But I am tired
Of trying and pretending
That you’re no brother of mine
Chaos, this is for you. You weready my brother and you still are. You hurt me and I hurt you maybe but one fight doesn’t end things.
Levi’s
I thought you were so cute
Standing there in your Levi’s 501s
Your brown eyes melted inside me
Then you gave me your Golden Gloves jacket
And I knew I loved you.
My mom didn’t like you—
Which made me love you even more
I imagined our future together
Then you found someone new
And asked for your Golden Gloves jacket back.
You broke my heart
And walked away.
You still looked fine in those Levi’s.
Hour 17: Tribunal
I will bear your justice
Should you wish to pass your judgement
I have no case to plea
I acted
I affected
Then I had to take the stand
I offer to your jury
Nothing but the truth
I am human
I am animal
You are no different in that regard
I can not wait for your verdict
Should you wish to deliberate
I have my life to serve
I have my fines to pay
You may wish to pass your judgement
I have no case to plea
I am guilty
I am criminal
And I will bear your justice
Should you wish to sentence me
Hour 17- Broken Heart
I awoke from the dream
Crying
I called to Bear
He came to me
He held me and I sobbed in his arms
I dreamed he would leave me
He promised he would not
And the feeling subsided
There would be two more dreams
Dreams where I walked alone
My heart breaking
But continuing on
Bear hating me in the dreams
Not speaking except in anger
The feeling so familiar
So remembered
From the grade school friend at 10
To my first official boyfriend at 13
To my broken marriage
Broken friendships
So many more goodbyes
Than I could count
The death of my grandparents and my parents
Death of my nieces and my nephew
A trail of my own tears drowning me
Haunting me at night as I slept alone
Remembering I can always survive
I always do, I always will
But the destitution
The crumbled walls of loneliness
They haunt me
I know the goodbyes are inevitable
Hearts get broken
People leave voluntarily or not
It is being haunted
By goodbyes and angry memories
The ghosts hold me in chains
I try to break free
But they always come back
I will inevitably end up alone
#8
Voices heard
words spoken
understanding happens
with listening
listening for meanings
of each word
outside
It’s so light outside, so bright outside
the sky is blue, who knew.
the sunlight gives the grass a glow
i’d never know, I’ve been cooped up
all day, but in a way i’m glad i was
not least because the air is fresh
and fragrant on the breeze
full of wistful scents-
and none of them is stale coffee
Daily Parade
Mama pulled out the stroller and
Put on my prettiest dress.
My heart started to beat faster
Cause I knew what this meant.
Will he be up on the roof or
Hammering a wall?
Will he talk to us this time or
Turn away like before?
As we get closer, mama fixes my hair
And I start to squirm and squeal.
I try to tell her to let me out
I can walk right up to him and make him see.
Would he notice my pretty bow or
My eyes just like his?
Would he swing me in his arms or
Bend and give me a kiss?
When we start to pass, a man walks over
But he isn’t him, so Mama keeps walking.
“He doesn’t work here anymore, Fran, so
You can please stop the daily parade.”
Didn’t he think I was pretty enough or
See my big smile and wave?
Doesn’t he know I love him or
Need him to be here with us?
Mama pushes us home a little slower.
My little heart hurts so much,
How could this be?
My Daddy doesn’t want me.
Daily Parade
Lue
August 13, 2016