July 1, 2020

I put Shasta down

Well, the vet did, but

I was there in a blue

plastic chair whispering

good girl  mama’s good girl

Her chest was full of fluid

She couldn’t breathe

That evening I took a walk

at the same time we always

took a walk and when I

came up the slope just past

the ditch with the big rocks

the sunrise was orange

The same orange as Shasta

I began to sob and I was glad

no one else was around

The more orange the sky

became, the more I cried

I tried to tell myself the sky

was a sign from Shasta and

I tried to let her go, but it

has been 360 days since then

and my heart still aches

 

STRENGTH

Strength is not always loud

The fortitude of one’s

Body or how long

You can 

E

N

D

U

R

E

Sometimes

Strength is in the 

B

  R

E

  A  

K

    I

N

  G

      The Choosing to concede

A war

Too long waged

  

To abandon

The battle field and

S

E

E

K

A new PURPOSE…

Veg@$$

Sometimes I want

To threaten someone

With an,

“I’ll go Vegas on your ass!”


It’s not a threat,

But it isn’t a promise.

 

Growing up in Vegas,

You knew parking lots

And movie theatres.

 

You knew mesa’s

And hot leather seats.

 

You knew

Jumping off roofs of

Tiled rooftops

And climbing back

Up

Into windows.

 

You knew pools,

And kissing,

And missing,

And wanting

Enough

To create

The world

Where we lived.


Dancing between

Slot Machines.

And riding

Casino elevators.

Caution (Hour 13)

Caution

By: LuvMiFreely

(Hour 13)

 

Shallow breathing

Whenever they come around

Clutching your chest

Panic setting in

You feel like the end is coming soon

They smile

As they watch the color draining from your face

You’re fighting for your life

Praying to God for more time

They know your time is near

They wait until you’re completely defeated 

As you lay waiting for your life to end

They thank you for allowing them to bring death to your spirit…

…be careful who you call your friend

“NO MERCY!”

“NO MERCY!”

Defeated.

Reorganize.

New plan.

Action.

Results.

Progress.

 

One step at a time.

We’ll get through this.

Tales

I grew up listening vast, varied, and fascinating tales,

Tales of lifelong struggles,

Tales of bloody battles,

Tales of desires and of great warriors,

Of heartbreaks and achievement,

Joy and doubt, destruction and construction,

All the times I listen, I question,

Is it life,

Or a place of illusions…

 

(Source : Remix poem from the acknowledge part of the book ‘the palace of illusions’)