The lights twinkle
at the neighborhood diner
announcing it’s
Christmas time.
She sits across from me
with her manic self
talking and laughing non-stop
while I watch her
exhausted by her energy.
She’s excited and I’m glad
but it’s a little too much
a bit too forced.
And I know all this energy
will spiral downwards
in the new year.
But right now,
it’s Christmas time.
I love the incremental decent in the shape of the lines:
“And I know all this energy
will spiral downwards
in the new year.”
It really well captures in such a visual way the ebbs and flow of emotional wellness during ‘the holidays’.
I also love the alliterative line “exhausted by her energy” as it is another very relatable feeling, natural extroverts amaze me.
I really liked this poem. =)
DSC
Darren Syme Coremans (@dscoremans)
https://thepoetrymarathon.com/blog/author/dscoremans/
#FoDiByLi
Thank you so much! I appreciate the feedback!
Fantastic piece. I can feel the mania. I really like the last two stanzas and how it is the end of the spiral you were talking about. Vivid imagery brings us into the diner with you. Thank you!
Thank you!
I love this poem so much! I feel myself in the diner, I can sense the manic energy. There is a bit of suspenseful dread in the spiraling down to come but for now it’s Christmas time and we continue on. This is a powerful poem about relationships that so many of us can relate to from our own experiences. Excellent!
Thank you
I love how this poem builds in tone and energy…the lights twinkle- it’s Christmas time…You contrast it with her manic energy…realize the effect that it will have in the future but decide to make the best of the situation…”But, right now, it’s Christmastime. I feel like you took me through the best part of a long story. Well done! Maybe submit this, Susan?
I love this. You capture so much, so concisely. As a reader I know what’s coming after Christmas, without you ever having to spell it out.