I am forgetting your voice.
I dont have it captured anywhere.
I kick myself for that
All this technology
Brain melting stuff
and I never thought to record your voice
I remember my aunt used to record Christmases when we were little
I want to comb through the pile of tapes and find you
Hold you again
If only with my ears.
I could close my eyes and hear your voice
Run my hand down the path you always ran down my cheek
Pretend it was you there
Comforting me like you would have
Pretend it was your thumb on my cheek and not my own.
When I could curl up at your feet and put my head in your lap, forever 10years old.
How do I do these things without you?
Who am I going to call for help when the baby wont stop crying?
How can I be a mother…
Without mine to show me how???
I run my thumb down my tear stained face.
Pretend its yours again.
Try and hear you.