The Poetry Marathon

I remember those stares through me
people forgetting I am there
even though I am right beside them
felt like a ghost

I often wondered if I existed
or am I just a ghost whispering things
Ignored by people I called friends
when I am sitting right there

I can’t count the number of times
I was left alone in a restaurant
because I spent one too many moments
in the bathroom and my friends forgot me

I listen a lot, while talk really less
After a while, my own existence doesn’t make a difference
Yet I felt comfort in listening
when other people talked around me

“I’m here” I want to yell
but I’m scared to make a scene
“Notice me” I want to ask
without sounding like an attention whore

Grant me a wish, God
If you exist and are merciful
I can deal with loneliness
but being invisible, I don’t think I can

–Surya T

He read the whole plan in a book

He intended to ease himself into the water at midnight

No one would know or blame themselves

They would spend time looking

but the plan was perfection

marked with science,

enzymes and bacteria

He loved readying the arrangements

His body would never be found

It worked perfectly for the antagonist,

and he’d been planning it for weeks,

There were no missing links from the

author’s description

of this painless goodbye.

He had always assumed he was safer with his books,

But that night, they were waiting for him on the bridge,

And he finally realized it wasn’t true that books

are safer than people.

He let them carry him home.

“Books were safer than other people anyway.”  – Neil Gaiman

Death waits uneasily

Impatiently…

Tapping his icy cold sharp fingers

Against the glass…

As the sands of time run away

Wondering where I am…

Forgetting

I am always late…

Lucky Me!

In the stars
high above
Are the myths
that I love
Greek or Roman
somewhere in between
Are the stories
heard not seen

There’s a hunter
and the fish
A falling star
make a wish
Some were clever
some were not
But above they
were all caught

When I’m feeling lost and broken and nothing is going right
I turn my eyes upon you and find comfort in your light
You’ve always been there for me when I’ve needed you more
You are my greatest asset when the wolf is at my door
I try to be there for you, but you’re stronger than I’ll be
I look to you for guidance, more than you’ll ever need me
I’m grateful that I know you, I am humbled that you care
You will always be my hero, even when you are not there
Sometimes, I may not get it and simply don’t understand
Why you will bend over backwards to lend me a helping hand
Yet, I still try not to question for I know we all need aid
The many ways you’ve shown me are debts that can’t be repaid
The sun is always brighter, the sky’s a deeper shade of blue
When life receives a blessing, such as I have found in you
For when it all seems hopeless and the future’s dark and gray
I know you are there to lead me, for you will show me the way

Hour Six

Prompt 6

Taking the Air

When I was a child 

and my grandmother lived with us, 

she got out in the  fresh air 

nearly every day. She kept up 

with the neighborhood as she toured,

with my friends’ families and 

with the grocer in the small corner store. 

She knew before many that he was moving

to a new store. There aren’t any 

such things as corner stores anymore, 

but when I put on my sturdy shoes 

every day to stride out into 

my neighborhood on my route 

long ago planned, I think of 

my Grandmother and how 

she would lace up her special shoes 

to go out and take in the air.

I care nothing about anyone to beg
I’ve done that before
drunken
ashamed
begging why not me?
Haven’t I proven myself to be worthy?

In your eyes
as if my own didn’t matter

My sight thrived on how I lived in others minds
maybe I can prove my love
when in fact it was never doubted

I was always invisible
alone in relationships
complimented just enough
to be brave
knowing it didn’t mean that I wasn’t afraid
it just meant
I am here
for now

I am no longer
even present for myself
still unraveling
in doing for my kids

can’t even say I’m caring for them
because Im struggling
through my own mind

still not begging
just moving

I’m okay with being lonely
I find comfort in invisible
sometimes that is what I prefer

I love to lose myself in a book
It takes me to places far away.
I immerse my thoughts into other lives
Other times, in other days.
People tend to frustrate me
With words that can cut like a knife
I find that with people, I’m rarely heard
They bring tension into my life.
When I have to make a choice
Do I read or go out in the world today?
I will almost always choose to read.
Books were safer than other people anyway.